Wednesday, August 9

It's Fantasy Land


No, I'm not referring to fantasy football, that utterly horrible, yet oh-so-necessary evil that encompasses most of our lives from now until January. No, I'm definitely not talking about the Phillies chances of making the Wild Card, which is definitely fantasy. I'm talking about preseason football, one of the most horrifically irritating things of all time.

I could waste everyone's time by presenting my opinions on the game, but I won't. I'm not even gonna talk about the first team performance. I will say that preseason football is the equivalent of going on a date with Anna Kournikova, only she has no clothes on, and she refuses to let you pay for dinner, and goes home at the end of the night without so much as a peck on the cheek. It's the worst form of blue balls in history, with the exception of actual blue balls. It's almost entirely unwatchable, and the parts that are watchable are wholly eclipsed by the rest of the crap. And we still have four more games worth.

I'll get back to you in a few weeks.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Yeah, blue balls do suck.

Beautiful post.

Armando said...

Muchas gracias

Anonymous said...

When will the blog be back in full effect, we are getting dangerously close to the start of the Birds' season.

BeantownPhillyKid said...

Yeah, I want Hal to start posting so that he can be both A) The Eagles blogger from the greatest physical distance and B) The least effective use of his grant money as possible

I say this, never meaning to exclude C) Precious.

Armando said...

Hopefully Hal will contribute from afar, as his insight into football is much greater than mine. However, my proximity to cheesesteaks makes me a viable contender.

Either way, expect it to pick up within a week or two, after my soul recovers from the stomping it got from the Phillies this year.