Gotta Have It: Vet Turf

This column is generally a stand-in joke, but this week I'm as serious as an old lady staring down a restaurant bill. I love the piece of rubble, too. Make sure I don't confuse it with my piece of the Berlin wall, although you could go around the city and probably find 10,000 vet stories for every one yarn on the old German divider.

But how much turf did this guy get? Half an endzone? What kind of connnections do you need to score this kind of green? I might prefer a ten minute phone call with this dude to his actual product. Also dig the lengths he goes to point out that this is definitley not the new nex-turf, it is in fact the green monster that legends like Fred Barnett and Wilbert Montgomery made their bread on. If you're still sore about missing my last 24 birthdays, feel free to mail this one my way.